Eat – Pray – Bullshit

When I updated my blog in Malaysia six weeks ago, I was just about to cross the border into Singapore. I left Johor Bahru by foot and walked right over the border. It did take me a while, and I was a little bit confused – I ended up exiting Malaysia twice in a 10 minute period; I cant help but feel that things should be better signposted!! Anyway I only allowed myself a couple of days to check out Singapore and I made them count. I stayed in Little India which was pretty lively and a good location, but it didn’t differ that much from walking the streets of where I used to live in Middlesex, London. The first thing I did was check out the Singapore Flyer (just like the London Eye) just to see how clean and efficient Singapore is from above ground; and it really was well structured and organised from high up! I did a few other things like stroll around China Town and Clarke Quay which were pleasant enough. On my last day, I took the famous Cable Car to Mount Faber and then over to Sentosa Island – If Disney made islands then Sentosa is it, quite extraordinary and worth checking out if anyone goes to Singapore. Of course my trip to Singapore would not have been complete without a trip to Raffles Hotel, home of the Singapore Sling cocktail. The cocktail was great, but I liked the bar better. It was really smokey with live jazz music, and thousands of shells of monkey nuts littering the floor – the place certainly had character!!

From Singapore I flew into Denpasar, Bali. As I hadn’t really made any plans at this point I decided to head to Kuta first…! For those who have been to Kuta you’ll know why I exclaimed that statement. For those who have not; Kuta is to Australians what Magaluf is to Europeans!

Something very strange happened on Kuta beach one afternoon. I was happily reading my book when this crazy looking guy walked up to me enquiring about my leg injury! I played dumb and asked him what he was talking about. He said he knew I had an issue due to the colour of my foot! This was all very trivial for about 10 minutes but he proclaimed he could fix my leg within 3 days. I guess a few weeks of being pretty immobile had made me desperate.. I told him to go for it! Anyway, he started playing with the muscles in my right foot and out of nowhere I had this surge of energy which I cannot describe flow through my leg… I bizarrely was then able to bend my knee up towards my chest (I had been struggling with stairs 1 hour prior to this). Feeling pretty encouraged by this I saw the witchdoctor an hour later for an Indonesian style massage which nearly made me cry. Accupressure plus a grown man walking all over my injured knee was horrible but my knee seemed to respond to it. I went to find this guy the next day but he disappeared! I stayed in Kuta for a few days and then decided to take a fast boat to Gili Trawangan, Lombok. “Gili T” is one of 3 islands that make up the Gili Islands which sit North East of mainland Lombok. The island is completely lush with amazing turquoise water with even better marine life just swimming around. Again, much like the Perhentian Islands in Malaysia; Reef Sharks and Turtles can be seen simply by jumping in the ocean and putting your head under the water. What I saw in just 3 days on “Gili T” was better than anything I saw in Bali! I could have probably stayed on this island for the rest of my trip which is why I knew it was time to leave… I was also spending an extortionate amount of money with obviously nothing to show for it! I booked a 4 night Boat trip through Nusa Tenggara, stopping off at some tiny little islands to swim/snorkel/trek, where eventually we would get to Komodo Island, Rinca Island and then finally Flores; home of the Komodo Dragon!

I knew the boat trip was going to be interesting when I saw 2 live chickens being passed from the coach onto the boat, when I heard that all 16 of us would be sleeping on the deck and finally when we realised we would not be washing for 5 days as there was no shower on board. I was very lucky that 90% of those on board Boat 3 were cool! Had so much fun despite a lack of sleep, poor hygiene and really really terrible tasting chicken. Saw some pretty spectacular stuff in the form of beautiful sunrises (yes I naturally woke up before 6am every single day), sunsets, dolphins cruising alongside our boat, sea eagles, flying foxes, Komodo dragons and sporadic dots of baron Indonesian islands scattered amongst the Flores Sea. As with all good things, the boat trip had to come to and end. I stayed on Flores island for one night before taking an epic 32 hour journey back to Bali. A journey that saw us take a ferry, small public bus, coach, ferry, taxi, fast boat and a minibus all impeccably timed; dropping us to Ubud, Bali.

 

I had no plans for Ubud except to take it easy and to start planning my arrival in Australia, and this was the place to do just that! A combination of swimming, snorkelling, climbing, hiking, jumping off boats and the 32 hour journey back to “civilisation” did not have a good effect on my knee. I spent my first 2 days back in Bali in Hospital. Finally got some good news so was looking forward to the rest of my trip. The very next day we went to see a traditional Balinese dance (Barong Dance), a temple surrounded by rice terraces, a Coffee plantation where I sampled the famous Luwak Coffee (animal poo), Mount Batur Volcano and Tegallalang Rice Terraces. At last I got to see the “real” Bali. The very next day was the cremation of a member of the Royal Family. It was the talk of the whole island and I’d been looking forward to it all week; the ceremony was taking place in Ubud. Unfortunately luck wasn’t on my side and I had picked up a bug or something… can’t help but think it was the animal poo I drank the day before but whatever.. I saw 10 minutes of the ceremony before I went back to my room. With the peer pressure from two Dutch girls I had been on the boat trip with, I made the decision to leave Ubud the next day and head back to Kuta for the last few days of my trip.

Before we left we went to see a Spiritual Healer. We had heard that some of the Healers in Ubud were quite enlightening so figured “when in Rome..” After two failed attempts with one particular Healer we went to see the infamous Ketut Liyer, the Spiritual Healer from the movie Eat Pray Love…

Ketut Liyer – Medicine Man, Healer, Palm Reader, Balinese Astrologer, Painter, Woodcarver, Bullshitter. Address: Pengosekan – Mas – Ubud – Bali, Phone: 0361 974092.

All I have to say is this man is full of shit. Coincidence that I’m living the same life as Julia Roberts (without all the money)? I’m going to live until I’m 100, my lips are sweet like sugar, I’m very lucky bla bla bla. I didn’t feel very “Healed” nor enlightened. I’d like to enlighten anyone planning on visiting Ketut Liyer… Don’t give this man your money… I’ll tell you that you’ll live until you’re 100 years old, going to stay with one person until the day you die, and that your lips are sweet like sugar… I went back to Kuta and spent my last few days on the beach (Tanning Club) and partying in Kuta’s Sky Bar, where drinks between 10-11pm were free, and where everything after that was so cheap it was basically free! Quite a fitting way to end my travels through South East Asia.

After backpacking a distance of 23,788 KM / 14,781 Miles; crossing 9 different border crossings, I am now in Melbourne starting the next chapter of my life!

Malaysia: Motorbikes & Monkey Juice

After a 5 hour wait on this busy platform, sitting on my rucksack watching crazy objects and people getting on and off of horrible trains; I took a sleeper train from Surat Thani in Thailand across the Malaysian border into Butterworth. From Butterworth I took a short ferry to Penang. As soon as I got off the ferry I was immediately struck by the heat, humidity and culture that Malaysia had to offer. Malaysia’s culture is extremely diverse, with Malays, Indians & Chinese all appearing to live in harmony. Despite Islam being the country’s national religion, you would not have guessed, with Chinese Temples, Catholic Churches, (amongst Mosques) scattered around each place I’ve arrived in. The food in Penang was great, every street corner you turned would bring something completely different. Tandoori Chicken with sauces and a huge flavoured Naan was a popular choice amongst a few people I travelled in Penang with, costing about £1-£1.50 (depending on the flavour of Naan you ordered)! I spent a few days in Penang (mainly Georgetown) walking the streets checking out the sights. I did visit Penang Hill, where a train takes you 850 Metres up a huge hill at a ridiculous incline; and at the summit you get the most incredible views of Penang Island, and Butterworth on Peninsular Malaysia.

From Penang I took a 3 hour ferry to The Langkawi Island, which I was really really excited about. I should have known things might go horribly wrong when within 10 minutes of getting on the ferry I was so sea sick. Actually thats a bit of an understatement. I was on a high speed ferry which has no deck area, I had to beg the captain to let me open a sealed (?) fire escape so I could get some air. I proceeded to climb ontop of the roof of the ferry where I was more sick than I have ever been! Shortly under 3 hours later, the boat stopped and my sickness subsided! Langkawi is an archipelago of approx 100 islands, and it really is lovely. I was on the main island which is HUGE. The only way to see more than one beach is by expensive taxi, or by Motorcycle…! I opted to see the island by motorcycle. After a couple of days on the beach 50 metres from my Hostel, I decided it was time to see a little more. I went out on the bike for a few hours, riding up and down through the mountains. Saw some spectacular scenery.. and then crash. I was slowing down to turn a corner and I “Lowsided” (thanks Chloe for telling me the technical name for my idiocy), I guess sandy gravelly wet roads have alot to answer for. Anyway, I had no choice but to get back on the bike to ride back to the other side of the island. I decided it was time to leave Langkawi.. I wasn’t really feeling open wounds and salt water and sand…

It took me 18 hours, 1 Taxi, 1 Ferry, 1 Bus Scam, 2 Tickets, 3 Buses & 1 more Taxi to get to Kuala Lumpur, and despite the Hospital being the first sight I saw, I instantly liked KL. The Hospital was amazing, very efficient. In the space of time it would take to even get seen in a UK hospital, I had registered, had a check-up, seen a consultant, had my wounds cleaned & dressed, picked up my prescription, had 2 x-rays and seen an orthopaedic surgeon. When I injured my knee on the bike crash I thought it was just a bad friction wound that needed attention, when my leg began to balloon I got worried. I was told I have effusion of the knee, some internal bleeding and a blood clot on the knee. I was under strict instruction to take my medicines and rest. I was to see whether the inflammation and bruising had gone down after 5 days, if not I would need a small operation – brilliant! I had originally intended to go straight to Cameron Highlands from Langkawi and drink tea and eat strawberrys and maybe go trekking as thats the done thing up there, I only wanted to visit KL for two days. Given the fact I could barely walk I knew trekking would not happen.  I ended up sticking around KL for 6 days. I didn’t achieve much, went to the cinema, bought a MacBook Air, went up the KL Tower and checked out a few shopping malls, one of which had a Rollercoaster In!!! And I watched alot of rubbish movies on HBO.

When the inflammation went down and I finished my prescription I decided to take a bus up to the Perhentian Islands. It was the one thing I wanted to do in Malaysia. When I got there I was glad I had made the effort. Spectacular!! I knew I would have to take it easy but this would not be a problem here! Beaches like I have never seen in my life (and I’ve seen a fair few now), and sea so incredible I could not believe my eyes. The whole island was literally like paradise. I stayed on Kecil which is the smaller of the two Perhentian Islands, and electricity gets turned off between 7am and 7pm… very very odd, and really inconvenient if you were looking to escape the heat and go to a cool room during the day… not an option! After 2 days on the beach, I was jealous of everyone going on amazing snorkelling trips. I had been trying to swim but my leg still didnt want to play. I made the decision I was going to do it anyway… I knew I wasn’t going to be able to chase fish through the water but I also knew It was unlikely I’d drown. We saw amazing Marine Life, swimming with turtles, sharks, saw dolphins and some crazy fish. A good day all round, think this was the best location I have ever snorkelled! The food on the island was amazing too, the 3 nights I was there I feasted on Barracuda, Shark & Blue Marlin. One thing that is completely native to the Perhentian Islands is Orang Utan “Monkey Juice”… Rum with Vanilla (4o Proof), if drank with anything other than 7up this stuff is gross.. but with 7up it’s drinkable. I’d heard from alot of people to stay away from this stuff… I didn’t think it was too bad… On reflection… I got drunk… Pete tried to fight a guy from Libya, and Chloe lost everything she owned that night… I also found her sitting in a fishing boat… Enough Said! Overall, I would recommend that anyone visiting Malaysia considers a visit to these islands, they are amongst the highlights of the last 3 months of  travelling!!!

I left the Perhentian Islands 48 hours ago as I needed to get to a Hospital before I arrived in Singapore… and I really didn’t fancy paying Singapore prices for Healthcare. I got a speedboat back to the mainland only to discover that all the Hospitals close at 4pm (it was 4:30), I went to a travel agent and decided to get the Singapore Sleeper train (15 hours) that night and get off at the last stop in Malaysia to visit a Hospital. When I booked the ticket I found out that there were no sleeper beds available for the next 3 days so I had to sit upright in small un-reclining chair for the duration, and it was boiling hot! Most uncomfortable! When I got off the train I couldn’t have planned it better, I was about 400 Metres from the Malay/Singapore border. I went to the Hospital, saw another Orthopaedic Surgeon who decided I did not now need the operation but that I would benefit from having an injection into my knee joint to reduce the inflammation. My Malay isn’t that good yet but I can only assume it was a corticosteroid injection because it bloody hurt. Even after 2 lots of anaesthetic I still felt the needle deep in my knee… why it took him 2 minutes to administer the shot I have no idea… maybe the fact I nearly cried amused him! Anyway I have 2 more weeks of pills, I still have a stone embedded under the skin, and I still have a blood clot on the knee which has not shifted… so more rest required! I checked into a hotel in Johor Bahru on the border and have decided to stay another night, but will head into Singapore tomorrow to meet back up with Pete and Jenna for 2 days. I have been given the all clear to fly to Bali on Monday, so I really will have to do nothing for 3 weeks… life is hard sometimes.

Life is Hard Sometimes…

 Cambodia & Thailand (For the 2nd Time)

 

After spending 3 weeks in Vietnam, I took a 7 hour bus trip from Ho Chi Minh City to Phnom Penh in Cambodia. Within 10 minutes of getting on the bus we were being scammed! It should only cost $20 to enter Cambodia but the guy on the bus was demanding $25! I questionned why there was a sudden increase in the price of the visa and told him I knew how much it should be… I was basically told.. pay it or make your own way across… I tried to be smart, telling him that I am making my own way across.. i’ve paid for a bus ticket.. but everyone else on the bus was paying what he asked so I had to bite the bullet…

Phnom Penh

I wasn’t the biggest fan of Phnom Penh, I think it was the tuk tuk drivers and the dirty streets which put me off. For 3/4 days having someone shout continually “lady wan tuk tuk” or “lady I love you, you wan tuk tuk” it drove me insane. I had only visited Phnom Penh to visit The Killing Fields of Choeung Ek, and Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum (S21) so I tried not to let the tuk tuk drivers or the street of brothels we were staying on distract me too much. On our first night though, we made the mistake of stumbling across a bar called Bojangles who made amazing Mojitos for $2…  Needless to say the planned day of sightseeing the following day did not go according to plan! S21/Genocide Museum was awful,it would have been difficult enough to go to with a clear head; but after an entire night of partying, this was not where I needed to be. For anyone planning on going to Phnom Penh, you must visit S21; it was one of my highlights of visiting Cambodia; but it was so so sad. 20,000 prisoners of the Khmer Rouge were killed here. The following day we visited Choeung Ek Killing Fields, where 8,895 bodies were discovered in mass graves. As a memorial, a Stupa was built which now houses 5,000 human skulls which were found on the site.

 

Siem Reap

I stayed in Siem Reap for 4 nights, the main purpose of visiting was to check out some of the Angkor Temples. We bought a 3 day pass which cost $40.. The thought of spending 3 days visiting temples did scare me but they were pretty spectacular. We hired a guide for day 1 to take us to Angkor Thom & Angkor Wat. Ta Phrom Temple (I’ve attached a photo) was my favourite; part of Tomb Raider was filmed here; but generally I preferred Angkor Thom to Angkor Wat (Angkor Wat being the most famous as it is said to be the largest religious monument ever constructed). On day 2 we visited Kbal Spean Temple, 1500m up a mountain about 50km away from Siem Reap. There are 11th Century carvings within the Riverbed here, so a little bit different from the others. Amongst others we checked out Banteay Srei, Preo Ko, Bayon, Baphuon, Pre Rup; and we even made it to check out sunrise at Bakong Temple –  I am 100% completely and utterly templed out even still!

 After Siem Reap I decided to head back to Bangkok so that I could begin to travel South through Thailand to reach Malaysia, as I am flying out of Singapore (to Bali) at the end of this month. Rhiannon was also heading to Bangkok as she was heading to Greece, so it seemed like a good opportunity to chill out in a city I really didn’t like on my first visit! – For one reason or another.. I ended up staying for 5 nights (AGAIN) but I had an insane amount of fun doing nothing! We met back up with Mariah & Solicia (met tubing in Laos) and between lazing around, shopping, going to the cinema, drinking buckets amongst other things; 5 days flew by! The last 3 nights were entertaining, we had a big night planned in Patpong (Red light district) for Rhiannon’s last night in Asia.. didn’t go according to plan… we stopped by a 7/11 a few hours before we were due to go out, and Rhiannon made the error of buying a 70cl bottle of rum… anyway we got as far as dinner but  were in bed by 11. We tried to then go to Patpong the following night but instead ended up at an art show/party, painting an excited naked guy (Art?) inside a shop on a street in Bangkok… very weird, just having a party on the pavement outside the shop. After painting the scary excited naked guy we ended up being dragged along to a pretty awful Thai Lesbian Club… I was unimpressed for a few hours as I really really wanted to go to Patpong by that point!! Anyway, 3rd time lucky… On my last night in Bangkok, Mariah, Soli & I went to a Ping Pong show in Patpong.. it was every bit as dirty and seedy as I thought it might be. I couldnt possibly tarnish my blog by going into detail… so i’ll list a few key things… Opening Coke Bottles, Firing Darts at Balloons, Blowing out Candles and a few other things… All of these ridiculous shenanigans on a weekend where Alcohol was prohibited from being sold due to the Elections…!

Anyway, im now on the beautiful island of Koh Phangan (detoxing). I have literally done nothing except read a book (Atonement… very good), and kayak in the sea – LIFE IS HARD SOMETIMES…. it is about to get harder.. I have only 2 days left before my visa expires so I’ve just booked a sleeper train to take me into Malaysia for the next 3 weeks… and as my luck would have it… I’ve managed to book the last remaining bed on the train, so narrowly avoiding overstaying my visa! Nice!

 

Fun & Games…

Wow, so it’s been about 7 weeks since I updated the blog :S – I have covered alot of ground since then… I ended my last entry in Luang Prabang (Laos) commenting that I would be off to Vang Vieng for more fun and games… (Here goes..)

Vang Vieng

I had never intended on physically tubing (if you dont know what tubing is.. google it..) or throwing myself off any platforms into the river whilst intoxicated.. but when in Rome… I met some crazy people on day 1 who managed to convince me to tube with them (I didn’t even have a rubber tube) . All of my valuables were kept “safe” in a waterproof bag (not so waterproof I recall after putting all of my money on a Barbeque at an Australian Bar 9 hours later), and I proceeded to try and swim 5km down the river, being pulled out along the way & enticed into bars on raised platforms with offers of free whisky shots & basically alcohol so cheap it was almost free. After several buckets of mojitos, the jumping off platforms commenced and we found ourselves mud wrestling, drinking buckets of “Happy Shakes” and abusing a weird Laotian guy (tranny/rent boy?) who looked like a troll.. in another city we later found people who referred to him as the “Treasure Troll” – you’d have to see him to believe it. Eventually when there were no more bars left along the river, we carried on tubing the remaining 4km (we hadn’t made it very far), this took several hours. The sun set, it became very cold, and we could see nothing at all except for fireflies illuminating the river… it was all amazing, even the part where Rhiannon used my hand to wipe vomit from her mouth. We reached the end about 8 hours after we started, exhausted, drunk, and with not very much money left… I only stayed in Vang Vieng  for one more day, doing the only remaining thing there is to do there if you dont want to drink or tube… spend all day watching Family Guy or Friends in one of the bars..

Vientiane

I left VV with the crazy cats I met tubing and travelled with them to Laos’ Capital City. With exception to riding bicycles around the city, I really have no idea how I ended up staying for 5 nights. I had to stick around to wait until 1st June for my flight into Vietnam so the days were spent strolling the streets drinking Carrot & Ginger shakes. There are two stand out parts to Vientiane I guess I can blog about… 1) – Drinking Snake Whisky… A present I bought for someone began to leak in my rucksack over my clothes so decided to drink it. What came next is without doubt the worst thing I have ever tasted in my life.. the taste of DEATH.. not sure how long the snake had been dead for, or left in the bottle, or how long the bottle had been leaking in my bag for, but all I think were contributing factors to the Death Burps I had for hours afterwards. 2) – Almost not getting my flight to Vietnam…. On the evening I was due to say goodbye to Ra, Solicia, Mariah & Angus (who were off to 4,000 Islands in Laos), I expressed my jealousy that they were going and I wasnt – I was encouraged to think about why I didn’t just go with them that evening (the bus was due 10 mins later). Suddenly, the fact that I had a flight to another country booked seemed irrelevant, we decided to flip a coin to decide where I’d go. Heads = 4,000 Islands; Tails = Fly to Hanoi – The coin landed on Heads! I had the hotel phone the bus company to see if there was 1 more seat available, it obviously wasn’t supposed to be as the bus was full – I said goodbye and loitered around Vientiane wondering whether the right thing had just happened.

Vietnam

So much happened in Vietnam, I’ve really had to summarise….

Hanoi: I got a flight into Hanoi as I was due to meet Pete, Jenna & Chloe (3 friends I went to Uni with) and travel with them from North to South. Randomly, the very first person I bumped into after getting out of the taxi from the airport was Rhiannon (the same Rhiannon who used my hand to wipe vomit from her mouth when tubing, and who I would then spend the next 5 weeks travelling Vietnam & Cambodia with). As soon as we were all together, we booked an amazing 3 day boat trip to Halong Bay & Cat Ba Island. We joked that we hoped there would be nobody else on our boat so that we could run wild…. There was nobody else on our boat except for a Malaysian family who were happy to let us have our space. We took over the top deck and had alot of fun drinking smuggled bottles of Vodka & Rum, and star gazing at the Milky Way. Highlights: Kayaking around Monkey Island, Sailing around the Karsts in the Bay, visiting an amazing cave, and passing out in a lifeboat on the top deck of our boat…

Hue

After a 4 hour bus ride from Halong back to Hanoi, Rhiannon & I jumped on a 14 hour sleeper bus heading South to Hue. The city was quite quirky with fantastic old buildings, with the main feature being the Citadel, an Imperial Forbidden City, surrounded by beautiful gates and a moat – really lovely to cycle around. Although not so lovely when we chose our day of cycling to be when it was 40°. We did a day trip to the DMZ (DeMilitarized Zones of the American/Vietnam War), stopping at various bridges, mountain ranges and statues which I guess I will one day need to read about. We visited the Vinh Moc Tunnels; a huge network of underground tunnels that were lived in for the duration of the war/bombings of that region.

Hoi An

3/4 hours South of Hue, we travelled to Hoi An – AMAZING CITY! Lots of culture, fantastic architecture, 2 beaches, and quirky little streets lined with temples, merchant houses, museums & Tailors. Hoi An is the place to go if you want clothes/shoes made, pretty impressive. We were up to catch sunrise one day at a place called My Son, waking up at 4:15 to visit some 4th Century Cham Ruins – Pretty spectacular. Had alot of fun, especially when we realised my camera can take Panoramic Photos… The last day in Hoi An was spent on a Vietnamese cooking course which was alot of fun – hopefully I’ll be able to remember a few things when I get home!

Nha Trang

I spent two days on the Beach in Nha Trang, really lovely place. Had heaps of fun snorkelling, jumping off boats, chilling on the beach and playing rubbish games with a football with Pete… finally a couple of days of doing NOTHING….

Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon)

After yet anothe 14 hour sleeper bus (the worst yet) we arrived in Saigon. This was probably my least favourite city. The streets were dirty roads, crawling with  traffic beyond belief at all hours of the day, and people hassling you, trying to sell you fake Ray Bans, photocopies of books & rubbish toiletries. I did visit an amazing museum which I’d recommend to anybody, “War Remnants Museum” Also visited Notre Dame, Reunification Palace (I will pay people to never visit this place, rubbish), the Botanical Gardens/Zoo and I went to the Observation Deck of Saigon’s biggest sky scraper. The Zoo was pretty awful, highlights being watching 2 hamsters huddling together in a tank with a Python, and also walking past a prowling Tiger’s Cage only to see a tiny kitten grooming itself in the middle of the cage. Not sure whether it got in there by accident!

Overall, Vietnam was incredible – a real surprise to the trip. I’d heard some horrible stories but this has been my favourite country so far. Some amazing cities, landscapes, history, culture & food!

More to follow… (Cambodia & Thailand Part Deux)…

 

Happy Pancakes…

 

CHIANG MAI

The first few days in Chiang Mai were pretty much written off by being hungover and torrential rain. I must admit this wasn’t in any way awful as I stayed at a really cool guesthouse (Julie’s) and met lots of people who too were in exactly the same position. When the rain eventually did subside I decided to book an excursion/adventure which would allow me to squeeze in as much as possible. So we visited a few of Chiang Mai’s Hill Tribes before going Elephant Riding. The tribes were cool, saw some with huge ears, long necks etc etc but it was actually really cool to see how self sufficient they were in their own little communities. Nobody in the Hill Tribes has any paperwork or documentation, they were apparently moved into the North of Thailand from Burma; so the only income they get is from Tourists buying their Arts/Crafts.

The elephant ride was an experience to say the least, trekking uphill & downhill through the jungle! I didn’t enjoy it though, it really did feel unethical. The elephants were shackled, and prodded with sharp sticks, their tusks had been removed and I just felt very guilty the whole time; so it was a relief when I got off and didn’t have to look at the poor things any longer. We then trekked ourselves through the jungle, it was really hardgoing; physically hard enough as it was but whilst being eaten alive by insects, dripping with sweat, and the 50°C heat in the Jungle it was insane! I ended the day with White Water Rafting; and then a slow cruise on a Bamboo Raft along the same stretch of river.. not really sure whether it should be called a Raft… as we were definately cruising under the water the whole time!

PAI

After the hill-tribes, elephant riding, trek, white water rafting, bamboo rafting, more Thai boxing and another lazy day at Julie’s I left for Pai; a very small town in the North of Thailand, on the Burmese border. After 3 hours &  several hundred sharp turns in the minibus going up and down through mountains, I arrived. I knew instantly that I was going to like Pai as it was so relaxed! It was like a small holiday village surrounded by an amazing landscape! We hired scooters and drove up to a Waterfall, a Canyon, Hot Springs and also to some Caves; all of which were amazing!! I only spent 3 nights in Pai as I knew if I stayed any longer then I would end up staying for weeks! – Not really part of “The Plan”

LUANG PRABANG

I left Pai last Monday (16th?) and travelled 7 hours by Minibus to the Thai/Laos Border town of Chiang Khong, arriving at 3 am! Was up at 6:30 to get ready to head to immigration to leave Thailand, and take a 2 day Slow Boat trip to Luang Prabang in Laos. Day 1 of the trip down the Mekong was pleasant; although I can safely say I was bored shitless! The boat finally left at 11am, and by 11:30 I had crashed and burnt (probably with all the excitement…); I awoke several hours later to find two kids that live on the boat, under my legs, playing with some war wounds I got from slipping during my trek in Chiang Mai; and taking pictures of themselves with my camera – Nice! At about 6pm we got off the boat at Pak Beng where we would spend 1 night before starting the second part of the trip. Pak Beng isn’t the sort of place that you would spend more than 1 night; I realised that during a 3 minute walk in the rain to the guesthouse. The guys running the guesthouse were high on Opium all the time. I knew there was something not quite right when I ordered a drink and 15 minutes later I saw the guy lying on his back, kicking his legs in the air, watching TV… He did offer me a Happy Shake with my Gin & Tonic… and a Happy Pancake… I knew I would have to be careful when ordering breakfast the next day…

Day 2 of the boat trip was equally as boring, but I stayed awake for a little longer on this occassion and made the most of it. When we finally did arrive in Luang Prabang it was instantly worth it. The city is really small but has a lovely quirky European feel to it. Every building is different from the next and again the landscape is amazing. Since I’ve been here I’ve probably seen more rain then sunshine.. but it’s so hot that rain or shine people are just taking it easy taking shelter watching the world go by! I havn’t really done much (pattern emerging) I went to an incredible waterfall; tried to climb to the summit but only got 65% of the way up before admitting defeat… The rain had washed away any grip and motivation I thought I had! I went to a really cool place called Utopia.. it’s like a cool, hippy-ish chill out bar/den on the river all laid out on bamboo decking; people smoking Shisha; and video’s of people walking on tight ropes across canyons (and weirder things) showing on a projector. Within 30 seconds of entering; a Belgian guy came over to me and said that Luang Prabang’s Chief of Police wanted us to join him for drinks… I wondered how interesting this would be seen as the guy was probably the same age as my grandad and was necking absinthe… the offer was declined! I was however informed that you dont say no to the Chief of Police.. anyway after about 6 double whisky’s (on ice) within a 30 minute period I knew we had to get out of there, it was very difficult to even leave the table even when he thought we’d be back within 2 minutes… the whole thing was very very very weird… I should add he spoke no English at all and the Belgian guy had to act as interpretor…

Off to Vang Vieng tomorrow morning for some more fun and games…

Tuk Tuks and Transexuals

Okay so I’ve been in Thailand for almost a week now. My first stop was Bangkok, the place is crazy!!! Admittedly I did opt to stay on or near KhaosanRoad which is Backpacker and tourist central. I saw a few buddhas (Happy Buddha, Lucky Buddha, Reclining Buddha…), temples, ladyboys and about 100,000 Tuk Tuks racing  around the city! I took various boats that operate as Taxis, rode the Sky Train (a Metro on a monorail as the roads are so heavily congested with traffic all day every day), went to China Town, walked around Siam Square for a day, and browsed my way around hundreds of market stalls all over the place. I also went to a Thai Boxing Fight Night which was an experience. I saw one guy take about 15 punches to the face in a 10 second period, only when one punch split the guy’s forehead open was the match stopped!! I decided to visit Kanchanaburi on my last full day in Bangkok, so somehow managed to find my way onto a minibus which the locals country bumpkins use to make the 3 hour drive. I was quite lucky in that there was one seat left when I bought my ticket, when I got on the bus I was sandwiched between 11 monks..! Was very surreal as the monk sitting to the left of me had an ipod, and the one to the right was playing Tetris on his mobile phone… I didnt think Monks had things..! Anyway when I got off the bus one lit a cigarette… that just confused my own perception of Buddhist Monks even more. An amazing day though, took some awesome photos of the River Kwai.

I’ve found Bangkok to be a really frustrating city. I really was quite pleased to be moving on. Everything is so money orientated it was horrible. People trying to scam you at every opportunity or sell you utter rubbish. Met alot of great liars too, one guy even told me I shouldn´t go to Kanchanaburi as the Bridge that runs over the River Kwai was closed… It definately was not closed, I had great fun infact standing on the Bridge pinned to the railings as a train passed over it! The whole time I was in Bangkok I really felt like I couldn´t trust anybody, I even questionned the integrity of the blind amputees riding the streets on skateboards somehow playing the harmonica…

I used Tuk Tuks quite alot, mainly as  Taxi’s just get stuck in traffic everywhere but Tuk Tuk drivers will even drive on the other side of the road, weaving in and out of cars/buses/mopeds so quite an efficient way to get around; the issue here is the drivers will use any opportunity going to try and take you to a Jewellers, Tailors, or Tourist Office where they get coupons from the owners (which pays for their fuel) if they get tourists to walk through the door.. so on days where I was in a rush to get to somewhere, trying to argue with the Tuk Tuk drivers to tell them to take me direct to my destination was a nightmare. Although, if you are prepared to make a quick stop to a tourist office and pick up a brochure, then hop back in the Tuk Tuk; the driver will only charge you about 20 Baht (40p) so quite an inexpensive way to get a 30 minute ride for pennies…

I arrived yesterday in Chiang Mai which is much cooler than the 33 degree heat that Bangkok had to offer, but in the 24 hours ive been here the number of insect bites ive got has quadrupled! I decided not to fly to Chaing Mai, but instead to take what I thought would be a 12 hour train ride. The train was half the price of the flight at about 12pounds but I thought it would be a good experience and that I´d maybe meet some people along the way…  Anyway the train carriage I was on was completely soleless so I had the whole lot to myself with exception to a young Thai guy who did not speak a word of English. I had a  really comfortable journey but it somehow ended up taking 17.5 Hours. I found the drinks carriage halfway down the train where I found Niels, a Dutch guy I´d met 12 hours earlier, propped up clapping away as  a hideously ugly ladyboy gyrated in everyone´s faces. It was hilarious, especially given you had to buy rum by the bottle and not by the glass…

Im going to spend the next few days trekking or rafting or riding elephants, that seems to be what people do here!

More to follow…

Proposed Itinerary

London, Thailand, Laos, Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia, Australia, New Zealand, Fiji, Home!

Hurdle Number One…

Obviously the thought of living out of (and packing…) a 65 Litre rucksack was always going to be a bit daunting, but nothing could have prepared me for the shock I got after spending £120 on Suncream, toiletries and medicines and realising that my rucksack really isn’t that big…

With my toiletries packed (and I use that term loosely…) I have a space of approx 30 x 30 x 10cm to pack my life into.

… 5 days left to review my priorities….